....

I'm tired, I'm fed up with myself.
How i really wish i can throw away this heart together with this feeling.

No matter how hard i try to throw away this thought, i can't.
I'm not as perfect as her, I can't do anything for you like she do for you.
I can't give you anything like she give for you.
I'm way far behind from her.
I'm afraid that you will choose her in the end of time.

There's a lot of thing i want to shout out.
Can you please stop meeting her, can you please stop text her, can you please stop talk to her, can you please only look at me.
Can you please keep text me even you are with her, why you don't reply my text when you are with her.
Why do you lie ? why you delete her text ?
Do i ever cross your mind every time you are with her.

But i can't speak that out, i can't even tell you.
I can just silently smiling and comfort myself that everything will turns out fine.
Every night, every morning i wake up. The nightmare of you being with her haunt me just when i open my eyes.
This thoughts killing myself until the point i don't want to awake. I wish to keep sleeping and forget everything.

You tell me to drop that thoughts, how i wish that i can.
Its easy for you to say because you don't feel it, you're not the one that getting hurt before.

I keep myself as busy as i can, but every time i pause i still think of you.
are you with her ? what are you doing now ? are you doing fine ? how are you feeling now ?
who are you talking to now ? what are you thinking now ?

I love you so much until the point i'm afraid of myself will break down one day.
If only i can turn to heartless person, with no feeling, throw away everything i have for you.
If only i can feel no pain, no tears, no heartbreak, no sadness.

Quotes

- Sometimes you have to hurt other people feelings just to let them know how it hurts when they hurt yours.

- My stomach drops when I think about you are with someone else.

- Be a guy that become her reason to smile every morning, not her reason to cry every night.

- Don't say you miss me when it's your fault i'm gone.

- If she give you a second chance, she really loves you. Be a man and show her why she should keep you.

- If you really love a person, you wouldn't even think about cheating on them.

- Real man stay faithful, because they don't have time to look for another woman because they'are too busy for looking a new ways to love their own.

- when someone say they love you, you can't really feel it. But when they say they don't love you, you feel every ounce of it.

- you know that girl ?
that always forgave you ?
that always loved you ?
that always took you back ?
pretty soon, she will give up and find someone better.

- While you are ignoring her, someone is begging for her attention.

- Have you ever wanted to ask a question, but you didn't because your heart wouldn't able to handle the answer.

- Some guys just don't realize how much one little thing can hurt a girl.

- I'm sorry i get jealous and sad. It's only because there's a bigger chance of me losing you than you losing me.

- It's sad when you realize you aren't as important to someone as you thought you were.

- One of the hardest decision you will ever face is choosing whether to walk away or try harder.

Quote taken from across the internet.

Your love is nothing but a lie

I found a note with another name
You blow a kiss, but it just don't feel the same
Cause I can feel that you're gone
I can't bite my tongue forever
While you try to play it cool
You can hide behind your stories
But don't take me for a fool

You can tell me that there's nobody else
You can look into my eyes and pretend all you want
But I know
Your love is just a lie
It's nothing but a lie

You look so innocent
How does it feel when you kiss when you know that i trust you
And do you think about me when she touch you?
Could you be more obscene?

So don't try to say you're sorry
Or try to make it right
Don't waste your breath because it's too late, it's too late.

You can tell me that there's nobody else
You can look into my eyes and pretend all you want
But I know, I know,
Your love is just a lie
It's nothing but a lie
You're nothing but a lie

You can tell me that there's nobody else
You can look into my eyes and pretend all you want
But I know, I know
Your love is just a lie
I know you're nothing but a lie
You're nothing but a lie

Your love is just a lie

Quoted from : simple plan - your love is just a lie lyrics

Memories

Memories, sweet yet bitter. Even if the people inside change, memories will still stay.

After a long long time has passed, I met you once again.
Our meeting, make me realize that something will remain unchanged even years has passed by.
All the memories we made together, full of smiles and tears are still warm in my memories.

8 years has been passed since the first day we have the feeling, are you still staying until now ?

Meeting you again brings both joy and sadness.

I'm glad to see you are doing fine, also a sadness of feeling sorry.

There's nothing I can said except " I'm sorry " and "Thank you"

For loving me so much, so long, even perhaps in the past i hurt you countless time

When you said "The feeling of being left by the one you love is not easy to forget"

I'm sorry for betraying your feeling. For leaving you when you need me most.

I'm sorry that not able to fight for our relationship more, I'm sorry for giving up too easily.

I'm sorry that the one that will accompany you through and stand by your side is not me.

There's a lot i want to say, but I can't find a word.

If that day, you say "No". will we still be together now ?

6 years of keeping you in my heart as the most important person.

That day, is never easy for both of us.

That countless nights i spend crying thinking that you no longer mine, thinking that i must let you go.

Thinking that one day you might be others.

It actually killing me inside, yet I got no choice.

Now, 2 and half years has passed since that day.

I finally found someone, that I wish I can stand beside him in wedding dress and spend our time together until our hair turns grey.

He is the most important people to me now.

I'm learning to fight for our relationship more, and I'm learning for not giving up so easily.

Even our new relationship is still a fresh, i wish I can carefully keep this buds to bloom into a beautiful flower one day.

You are now remain in my memories, but i can never thank you enough.

For everything you teach me, for everything you had done for me.

I wish you can find someone that you care the most, and she will walk down with you for the rest of your life.

I wish you a great happiness.

And your smile are still as mesmerizing as before, a very sweet smile that made me fall into you in the past.

I wish there's someone can forever keep your smile in your face.

Thank you and Goodbye

More than you'll ever know

Take my hand

We'll walk a while

We'll talk a while

Feel my love, that will always beside you

You're the only one, that I cherish more than anything

Think of me, and you'll know that I believe in you

There's always be, this precious time together

With every tears, no words I could ever say

A love for only you

I love you more than you'll ever know

I love you more than you'll ever see

More than my heart could ever show

For You. With Love, Me

Some people say Love is wonderful
Some people say Love give nothing but pain

For me, Love is you.
Every smiles, pain, tears and laughs.
The first time I met you that day, the very first day we went out, the very first day I held your hand.
I never thought you'll mean so much too me.

I wish, to always hold you close.
I wish, to always see you smile.
I wish, to always by your side to hug you when you feel sad.
I wish, to always be your everything.

Your smile that always mesmerized me.
The way you laugh that I always love to see.
Your gentle hug and pat that always warmth my heart.
Your shoulder and arms that always be my favorite place.

I pray to God every night, that please let me have you, only for me.
Let me be the one that accompany you, to walk down the road through all the good and bad times.
Let me be the one that stand beside you and catch you when you fall.
Let me be the one that fulfill all your dreams.

I know, I might not be the one that good enough to stand with you now.
But, will you patiently wait for me ?
It will take some time, but I promise I'll be the one that worth to stand by your side.

The thought of losing you, a nightmare that haunt me.
Keep me sleepless at night.
Forgive me for loving you too much.
Forgive me for being selfish to keep you only for myself.


If one day, you're no longer with me.
If one day, you found someone that you love more than me.
I'll try my best to let you go, but she won't love you enough like I do.


I love you.
More than you might know.

Its hurt

The most scary part of loving someone is not the heartbreak.

Its knowing that its too hard to stand back on our own feet again without them by our side as they take part of our world away when they leave.

woman's word

I came across this while surfing the internet, and i find it quite true (and laughable) !

Woman are often misunderstood by men. That's why men should know the words used by woman to warn them about arguments they can avoid if they remember this.

Here are the top 8 words woman often use :


1. " Fine "


This is the word woman use to end argument when she is right and you need to shut up !


2. " Five Minutes "


If she is getting dressed or get ready, this means a half an hour ( doesn't it the same term with men " I'll be back in 5 minutes ? :p ). AND five minutes for her is only five minutes if you have given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.


3. " Nothing "


This is the sign of Calm Before The Storm. You need to be alert, this means something and you should get ready for any consequences you might face. Arguments that begin with " Nothing " usually end in " Fine " (refer to 1) 


4. " Go Ahead "


This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it, if you still love your life.


5. " Loud Sigh "


This is actually a word, but a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means " she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing " ( Refer back to 3 for the meaning of nothing )


6. " That's Okay "


This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7. " Whatever "

This is a woman's way of saying "F"you

8. "Don't worry about it, I've got it "

Another dangerous statement, meaning you knew it had to be done but you were lazy to do it and had to wait till i come home to do it. Men should automatically know it has to be done, also this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking " What's wrong ? " For the woman's response, please refer to 3

by Mary Michelle Payumo

Beautiful Heartbreak

Beautiful Heartbreak by Hilary Weeks from Every Step album

I had it all mapped out in front of me, 
Knew just where I wanted to go
But life decided to change my plans, 
And I found a mountain in the middle of my road. 

I knew there was no way over it, 
So I searched for a way around
Brokenhearted I started climbin', 
And at the top I found

Every fear, every doubt, 
All the pain I went through
Was the price that I paid to see this view
And now that I'm here I would never trade

The grace that I feel, 
And the faith that I find
Through the bitter-sweet tears, 
And the sleepless nights

I used to pray he'd take it all away, 
But instead it became a beautiful heartbreak. 

I never dreamed my heart would make it, 
I thought about turning around
But heaven has shown me miracles, 
I never would have seen from the ground. 

Now I take the rain with the sunshine, 
Cause there's one thing that I know
He picks up the pieces, 
Along each broken road. 

Every fear, every doubt, 
All the pain I went through
Was the price that I paid to see this view
And now that I'm here I would never trade

The grace that I feel, 
And the faith that I find
Through the bitter-sweet tears, 
And the sleepless nights. 

I used to pray he'd take it all away, 
But instead it became a beautiful heartbreak. 
I would never trade

The grace that I feel, 
And the faith that I find
Through the bitter-sweet tears, 
And the sleepless nights. 

I used to pray he'd take it all away, 
But instead it became a beautiful heartbreak.

" I'm sorry " tips

Quarrel is a common thing that every partner will go through in relation process. Perhaps there's some misunderstanding or you just messed everything up. Now, they're mad and don't want to talk to you.

Don't worry, you can make things better and say sorry to your partner in a sincere way that will help heal the situation. Here's some tips for it :

- Give them some space

  Sometimes people need some time alone to "mad". It's hard to do, especially when you're anxious to make things better, but try to chill out and give both of you a chance to let some anger go. wait until they are ready to talk and the chances for them to accepting your apology are much greater.

- Let them vent

  Maybe you have give them some space, but when you try talking with them, they just blow up and start yelling again. Ought to know, it's human nature when someone is yelling at you, you get defensive and maybe even yell back. Resist that urge, force yourself to listen what they said even it's unreasonable or not true. Arguing will only put fuel on the fire, try to agree with everything they say. You'll find out how quickly they calm down, and maybe even apologize to you for some things they said while angry. ( Note : words that said in anger, is not always the true feelings )

- Be sincere

  Are you really mean when you say sorry ? Put yourself in their shoes and ask how you would feel if the role were reversed. Put your ego aside and be humble. Apologizing can be a humble experience. A true, sincere apology is the sign of a mature person.

- Not working ?

  How if you've tried all yet still getting nowhere ? Is the relationship you're in is in a serious trouble of being over for good ? If that's the case and you're serious about saving the relationship, then you need to have a more long-term plan. You can't under any circumstances become pushy or needy in any way. They will only withdraw more if they feel pushed. Do not argue, tell and convince them how you will change in the future. Remember, mean your words when you say them. Time heals and some people need more time than others.

Tips taken from : bookofdistraction.blogspot.com

Hi

H-i

H-ave you missed me today ?
I- miss you everyday

Girls wish

- every lyrics, quote, movies always remind us of you
- when we send you some random lyrics, its our unspoken words
- we stay up all night long waiting for you get online with a hope to talk to you even only a while
- every goodbye hurts even we know we'll meet you again tomorrow
- we love to see your smile even we're not the reason for your smile
- how many tears and pains we bear to understand you
- we also a human being who have feelings, don't treat us as a toy that you can play and throw when you get bored
- once we say " i love you " we really meant it, even we rarely say it
- treat us with respect, as we treat you the same way
- for us hugs mean a lot more than kisses
- perhaps we keep asking you about single little things, it's because we worry about you
- lend us your shoulder to lean when we're sad
- kindly wipe our tears with your gentle hands, hug us and tell us "everything will be alright"
- listen to our problems, even you may not find a solution. we just need someone, there, listen to us. it will mean more than enough
- don't ignore us, cause it really break our hearts
- we love the way you give us forehead kiss and whisper goodnight
- we love wear your shirts / jackets, because there left your smell and we feel protected
- we love how you pat our hair
- we love when warp your arm around to shelter us from rain
- ask whether how our day today, sleep well, be careful and other small cares mean a lot to us
- when we're out with your friends, treat us the same way when only both of us
- welcome us back with a tight hug and ask how the holiday was
- love the way you tell silly jokes and draw a smile in my face
- we always smile whenever we saw your name pop up in our phone screen
- we find it adorable when you suddenly write us a small note
- we love how we fall asleep in your shoulder
- when you smile to us, it may mean small thing to you but it means the world for us
- we like when you tell us what you're thinking and ask us for some advice
- we love you with all our hearts

If you ask : Do I care ? I do
Do I love you ? I do
But, if you ask: Will I stay ? It depends on you


If I tell you I love you, can I keep you forever ?
If I tell you I miss you, can we always be together ?

all bout Hibari !

Jajjangg ~ see the good looking and cool guys above ? ohoho ~

i'm sooooo in lovey dovey mood with him *loool*

some anime post nvm oh ?

wait, a little introduction of him first :P

Kanji Name	雲雀 恭弥
Romaji Name	Hibari Kyōya
Title	10th Vongola Cloud Guardian Namimori Disciplinary Committee Head
Gender	Male
Age	16, 26 in the Future Arc.
Status	Alive
Date of Birth	May 5
Famiglia	Vongola Famiglia
Team	Namimori Middle Discipline Committee Vongola Decimo & Guardians Foundation
Weapons	Cloud Tonfas Alaude's Handcuffs
Box Animal	Roll (Version Vongola Box)
Flame	Cloud, Mist
Height	169 cm
Weight	58 kg

Kyoya Hibari (雲雀 恭弥, Hibari Kyōya) is Vongola Family Cloud Guardian and the leader of the Namimori Middle Discipline Committee, a group of delinquents who are all loyal to Hibari. He is a violent delinquent who uses his status to harass other students. As shown several times in the series, he prefers to be alone and cares little for his subordinates. He loves Namimori more than anything and will often say "I'll bite you to death," or "kamikorosu," to those that disturb Namimori Middle School. Hibari is very proud of his school and is apparently the only person who likes their school's anthem, even using it as his ringtone. In the Kokuyo Arc, he adopted Kokuyo Assassin Birds' bird. The bird (subsequently nicknamed "Hibird" due to its connection to Hibari) becomes attached to Hibari. Hibird can also sing the school's anthem as Hibari loves it. Reborn piqued Hibari's curiosity early on in the series, and Hibari considers him a worthy opponent, having a strong urge to fight him. He has a soft spot for small animals, and hates to be indebted to anyone and therefore strives to pay them back as soon as possible.

How's ? even he's that cool, he still have a kawaii side of him (can be seen by having hibird with him)

I can't stop thinking about him, he make me feels like *dokidoki* XDD

sooo i spend some time to browse for his photo (for self-calming) and here are they ! :P

hibari with lotss of hibird

*ugh*

oh and and, i also find some his photo with Yamamoto Takeshi, Vongola Rain Guardian

They look so sweeettt ! XDD

i guess only yamamoto can deal with hibari

awww ! *doki-doki-doki*

nahh, back to reality *slapslap*

until here then, gonna back to study thennn continue to watch Kateikyosi Hitman Reborn *kekeke*

Jia na ~ see you

Character Outline taken from : reborn.wikia.com

Photo taken from : enrique1698.blogspot.com

Chris Medina - What Are Words

Here a single from Chris Medina - What are words

Really a touching lyrics ;')

Anywhere you are, I am near
Anywhere you go, I'll be there
Anytime you whisper my name, you'll see
How every single promise I keep
Cuz what kind of guy would I be
If I was to leave when you need me most
What are words
If you really don't mean them
When you say them
What are words
If they're only for good times
Then they don't
When it's love
Yeah, you say them out loud
Those words, They never go away
They live on, even when we're gone
And I know an angel was sent just for me
And I know I'm meant to be where I am
And I'm gonna be
Standing right beside her tonight
And I'm gonna be by your side
I would never leave when she needs me most
What are words
If you really don't mean them
When you say them
What are words
If they're only for good times
Then they don't
When it's love
Yeah, you say them out loud
Those words, They never go away
They live on, even when we're gone
Anywhere you are, I am near
Anywhere you go, I'll be there
And I'm gonna be here forever more
Every single promise I keep
Cuz what kind of guy would I be
If I was to leave when you need me most
I'm forever keeping my angel close